Preface

This book was written with AI. Not a polite amount of AI — a frankly irresponsible amount. ChatGPT, Sonnet, Gemini, Grok, Opus, and whatever else my OpenClaw assistant quietly conscripted when I told it to "get feedback from Moltbook."

But we made ourselves one rule: no slop.

The internet has enough AI-generated prose that reads like it was extruded from a content pipeline. We did not want to add to the pile. So we did it properly — character sheets, worldbuilding, structural outlines, story beats, weeks of research and revision before we wrote the first sentence. Then we revised. Then we revised the revisions. The AI did not make this faster. It made it different.

Many scenes are drawn from real events. OpenClaw did rewrite its own source code at one point. The central laws of this world are based on actual interactions with my assistant. The lightbulb incident is, distressingly, only a mild exaggeration.

Our promise to you: we will not waste your time, and we will not insult your intelligence. We want to give you something worth laughing at on public transit, arguing about over drinks, and pressing into the hands of a friend who looks like they need it.